WMBC Random Thought of the Week 5/4/10

I guess the whole conversation started innocently enough. All that was asked was, "Anything going on this week?"

That's what prompted the answer that started the wheels in the head for this post. One of my friends chimed in, "Well, Wednesday is Cinco de Mayo, and I got a handle of Cuervo I've been looking to kill."

We all shuttered slightly, but agreed. The shuttering was because most of my friends' tequila past has come in the form of Montezuma Blue, a "tequila and liquor blend" which is advertised by its own company as "a great-tasting [tequila] at a great cost per drink!" (Going down the "bang for your buck liquor" path usually ends with bad decisions)

But cheap liquor will always be cheap liquor, and that's hardly a topic worth random thought-ing about unless I get desperate for ideas, which is why the mutual agreement of how we were going to spend our Cinco de Mayo is the important part of this post.

I'll be honest, none of my friends present last night are of Mexican heritage whatsoever, but that doesn't stop us melting pot-ians from celebrating holidays that totally are not ours (ouch). It's that whole leftover manifest destiny mentality with the "we are all one" mantra and the fact that we love finding reasons to drink...excessively. But when you stop and think about these holidays which have become alcohol-ized, do their origins actually line up to modern day celebrations?

Take for instance Cinco de Mayo. Mexican Independence Day, right? Nope, that's September 16th.

Hell, the day Corona was first brewed? No again (at least, that's not why Cinco de Mayo is known world wide).

It's known for the Battle of Puebla, when an outnumbered and less equipped Mexican army delayed the inevitable taking of Mexico city by the French defeated an invading French army. Let's rip tequila, hombres, right? Wrong yet again (jeez, you should give up on the guessing). This holiday is only regionally celebrated in Mexico.

But Cinco de Mayo isn't the only holiday like this. Oktoberfest started as a marriage and subsequent horse racing celebration. And last I checked, St. Patrick wasn't pounding Irish car bombs every March 17th saying, "I'm gonna die on this day in a few years so...whose up for another round?" The founding fathers weren't sitting around lighting fireworks, drinking imported beer, and taking down hot dogs like the greatest American athlete alive as they prepared to declare independence.

But I guess, who cares, right? If nothing else, these days present a day to celebrate various heritages, even if it becomes about that heritage's most popular liquors. So enjoy Cinco de Mayo and go Corona crazy. As you stare at that tequila in front of you and think "ugh, there are twice as many shots in that bottle as there is space in my stomach" just remember that at the Battle of Puebla, they were outnumbered too.

Hey, Mexico City eventually got conquered despite the valiant defense at Puebla. If you want to celebrate the history behind Cinco de Mayo, make it to Seis de Mayo before you inevitably get conquered too.